Hawaiian Wedding Ceremony

Hawaiian wedding. Photo courtesy Asad Photo on Pexels.   A Hawaiian wedding is rich with tradition and symbolism. Each ritual adds upon the one before it to evoke the reverence for nature, the eternal nature of love, and the importance of the aloha spirit. Here I offer a glimpse into the multifaceted Hawaiian wedding ceremony.  

The Altar & The Officiant

A Hawaiian wedding takes place at an altar. In the sand at the foot of this altar, the bride and groom stand inside a circle of flowers as they exchange leis, vows, and rings. This colorful circle of blossoms represents a circle of love. A holy man, called kahuna pule, or Kahu for short, officiates the wedding. He may or may not be a priest. However, he does possess the legal power to perform the wedding. As the guests arrive, they enjoy the gentle music of the ukulele and the slack-key guitar. Custom allows for the groom to mingle with his guests as they are seated. When all is ready, the Kahu blows on a conch shell (pu), taking pains to blow the conch in each of the four directions - north, south, east, and west. This signals the groom to take his place in the circle of love, facing away from the aisle. It also calls the bride to the Hawaiian wedding ceremony. In addition, the directional sounds call to the sea, land, air, and fire to attend and bear witness to the holy union.  

The Hawaiian Wedding Ceremony Begins

Alone, the bride walks down the aisle toward her groom. At some point, he turns to face her, seeing her for the first time in her wedding attire. The guests enjoy the full glory of his smile, as he greets his bride for the first time on their wedding day. Upon taking her place within the circle of love, the bride may or may not take her groom's hand. Traditionally, Hawaiian couples refrain from holding hands until near the end, when they exchange their rings. However, modern couples sometimes hold hands throughout the ceremony. Next, the couple exchanges leis. As an unbroken circle, the lei represents their devotion and eternal commitment to one another. In addition, it represents the enhancement that happens for each of them in coming together in the bond of marriage. Just as the beauty of each blossom is enhanced in relation to the others, so a husband and wife enhance each others' strengths through the bonds of matrimony. After this, the musicians play the Hawaiian Wedding Song. Originally written in 1926, the song was translated into English in 1958 and given the name Waiting for Thee. It became famous when Elvis Presley performed it in the film Blue Hawaii. Traditionally, a hula dance accompanies the wedding song as an interpretation. Following the song, the couple says their vows, with the help of the Kahu who coaches them through.  

Koa Wood & Ti Leaf

Next, the couple will exchange rings. However, first the Kahu performs a special ritual to bless the wedding rings. Koa wood, a Hawaiian native hardwood, represents strength and integrity. The Ti leaf promises prosperity, health, and blessings. The Kahu takes a bowl made from Koa wood and dips it into the sea to gather some water. Then, he drops a Ti leaf into the water. Finally, he sprinkles the wedding rings three times with this holy water while chanting in Hawaiian. In English the chant reads: May peace from above rest upon you and remain with you now and forever. This ritual serves two purposes. First of all, it calls upon the ocean to wash away any hindrance to the relationship. Secondly, it symbolizes a fresh new beginning for husband and wife. After the ritual, the bride and groom place their wedding rings upon each others' fingers. As is customary in the States, they wear their rings on the ring fingers of their left hands.  

The Sand Ceremony

At this point in the ceremony, the bride and groom each take a vessel filled with sand. Each vessel contains a different color of sand, one color representing the bride and the other representing the groom. Upon the altar, a third empty vessel awaits them. They walk over and simultaneously pour their sand into the third vessel. The mingling of the two colors visually symbolizes the permanence of their union. Now, with the two colors mixed together, no one could separate the colors perfectly again. Many Hawaiian couples retain this third vessel of sand as a keepsake for their new home.  

Ti Leaf & Lava Rock

The final ritual of the Hawaiian wedding ceremony entails the bride and groom wrapping a lava rock in a ti leaf. The lava rock symbolizes the lifetime commitment they've made to one another. The Ti leaf cloaks this commitment in blessing and prosperity. They leave this talisman behind in the spot of their union as an offering and a prayer. While they wear their rings wherever they go, as a symbol of their union, this offering remains grounded in the birthplace of their union. At this point, the Kahu blows the conch once again to symbolize the ending of the sacred ceremony. A brief word about the wind - many Hawaiians believe that whenever the breeze kicks up during a wedding it means those loved ones who are absent have come in spirit to bless the marriage. These absent loved ones might include ancestors who have passed on, or living friends or relatives who could not physically attend the wedding. This transforms what otherwise might be an annoyance into a pleasant comfort for the bride and groom. ~Angela Magnotti Andrews